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About Me Member Pseudo-Intellectual chaosmakirMale/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 3 Years
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kelly, chaos, and time

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Labels or Love...

Journal Entry: Tue Nov 24, 2009, 9:17 PM


Sex and the City is almost finished. I find it so weird that I am touched by every heartbreak, tragedy, and moment of weakness. It's so cliché for me to watch emotional movies like this (I suppose that's true), but I shouldn't be watching them alone. Yet here I am. Alone. Watching a touching movie when there is no one here to hold me.

I find it sad the character I connect with most is Carrie. Poor, jilted Carrie. I connect with the character that I feel has been hurt the most. That is probably the worst part in all of this. I am so happy right now, and yet sometimes it's easier for me to dwell on the pain. I feel sorry for the people around me. My life is not a pity party, and yet, I feel like everyone thinks I want affirmation that my life is normal. I don't. That is definitely not my style.

Lately I've been very depressed. Seriously depressed. Maybe it is my current situation. Maybe it is the feeling that I've become someone who I don't fully know anymore. As I develop the things I feel I let what I have been influenced to believe go. It feels liberating for a short while, but later it becomes daunting. What do I believe? There are things I've never thought about. Things that are becoming front burner are items I never thought I would worry about. It is so very disheartening. I am no longer sure of where I stand. What was once black and white is now grey. Dismal grey.

I would love to hear somebody else talk about such things, and perhaps how they've overcome them...

  • Mood: Passionate
  • Listening to: "Labels or Love" Fergie
  • Reading: "Arch Enemy" by Frank Beddor
  • Watching: "Sex and the City: the Movie"

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Devious Info

  • Current Residence: the Back of Your Mind
  • Interests: Sounds Words Colors People
  • Favourite movie: the Princess Bride
  • Favourite band or musician: Lady Sovereign, Jars of Clay
  • Favourite artist: Pablo Picasso
  • Favourite poet or writer: Cummings
  • Favourite photographer: V. Adams
  • Operating System: Vista
  • MP3 player of choice: iPod
  • Shell of choice: Naked
  • Wallpaper of choice: Not Paisley
  • Skin of choice: Ummm. Mine?
  • Favourite game: Final Fantasy
  • Favourite gaming platform: Nintendo DS
  • Favourite cartoon character: Mokona Midoki
  • Personal Quote: OMG! I love your music. If I weren't gay I would so be on top of you right now.
  • Tools of the Trade: My Fucked Up Imagination

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Comments


:iconfallenidle:
WUV U

--
If she has to tell the story,
She tells it slowly

- ~AnUrbanNomad, "And They Didn't Sleep..."
:iconpopcoredork:
thank you <3 :]

--
No hospital can fix what I've become.
:iconyouinventedme:
thanks for the :+fav: on eleven things about people who could be you


xo!

--
an antique arms and armor expert
:iconfallenidle:
Your webcam makes me laugh every time I see it! Your friends' face is priceless.

And SO are YOU.

--
If she has to tell the story,
She tells it slowly

- ~AnUrbanNomad, "And They Didn't Sleep..."
:icondlinkwentjd:
Thanks for the :+devwatch: babe!!!

:hug:
:iconabuseofreason:
Thank you hubbbbbbbbbbbby!

--
"You are responsible for the consequences of your convictions."
-Jack McCoy
:iconpopcoredork:
hey :]

Thiiiis is my new name. Apres seventeensentences. ^_^

how're you?

--
No hospital can fix what I've become.
:icongelal:
Yeppers fella!

:headbang:

--
"These things happened. They were glorious and they changed the world... and then we fucked up the endgame." - Congressman Charlie Wilson on the covert war in Afghanistan 1980-1989 .
:icontricksyriver:
Thanks for the :+fav: on My Lion.

Much appreciated. :heart:

--
I like my soul on text. I love your soul on toast.
:iconfallenidle:
Thank you for the fav my dear one!

--
If she has to tell the story,
She tells it slowly

- ~AnUrbanNomad, "And They Didn't Sleep..."

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